I don't think I need to do a long Title just because it seems to be the 'in' thing to do.

Snow? In August? Who'd have thunk it? It's bitingly cold out there, and here I am sitting at my desk looking out through the bamboo to the wind, cold and ice that has taken over our land. But meh, who cares. It's winter. It's Canberra. What else should I expect? I've been in a mood. Yes, you heard me. A mood. I don't quite know how to put a genre on this mood, but maybe I don't need to. I have just been feeling so 'Meh', and 'Blah' and 'Groan' that I haven't felt like doing much of anything. Pity I don't have that luxury and whilst the public servants all stop doing 'important' stuff, (Thanks Enny from newly discovered blog, The Enny Pen), I must continue to code this agent, and fix this script library and do generally boring-arse crap. I feel down I guess, but I think it's more than that. It's a cumulation of a few things that I have been avoiding thinking about that are now reaching the frontal lobe of my brain (or whatever..Mr Brain Surgeon), and deciding that I must deal with this shit now or I will never be happy. I'm going to a counsellor on Monday. I'm excited/nervous/anxious/scared/annoyed about this. Yeah, work that out. I know I can't. I just want my head to be clear and clean and open and ready to face the future. But I can't face the future until I work out what the fuck is in my head and swirling around me. I dunno if this makes sense to anyone reading this, but I think it's time that I start to use this place as a bit of a dump for my brain. Not that I don't have friends for that sort of thing, but I daresay some of them may be sick of it. Is it hard to 'Be Happy?' (tm) Maybe it's not. If it is, it shouldn't be, Dammit. Blog-Meet update: August 26th. Wig n' Pen. It's on. I'll bring the balloons.

Posted by Mick @ 8/11/2005 03:49:00 pm